The Fourth Commandment given to Yisrael at Matan Torah was זכור את יום השבת לקדשו Remember the Shabbos to make it holy. What exactly are we to remember? The Medrash relates the following
(ב"ר יא ח) אמרה שבת רבש"ע לכולם נתת בן זוג ולי לא נתת. א"ל כנסת ישראל יהיה בן זוגך.וכיון שעמדו ישראל לפני הר סיני אמר להם הקב"ה זכור את יום השבת לקדשו זכרו הדבר שאמרתי לשבת כנסת ישראל היא בן זוגך עכ"ל.

Shabbos came before Hashem and asked to have a mate like the other days of the week as she is the odd number out without a companion. Hashem answered her that Am Yisrael will be her mate. This conversation between Hashem and Shabbos is alluded to in the mitzvah of זכור את יום השבת לקדשו , Remember My conversation in which I promised Shabbos that you Yisrael will be her חתן. Be sure to make her sanctified.

In short every Shabbos is viewed as the marriage between us and Shabbos. This was the intention of Rav Shlomo Alkabatz who composed the Payit of לכה דודי לקראת כלה to be recited during Kabbalas Shabbos. "Go my beloved Yisrael and meet your approaching Kallah Shabbos. This Payit was based on the Chazal (Shabbos 32b) Rabbe Chaninah would say בואו ונצא לקראת שבת כלה Let us go out and greet Shabbos the bride.

This marriage that takes place on Shabbos in not merely a fantasy or a fleeting imaginative experience but rather a real happening to the point that the Tefillos of Shabbos are different than those of Yom Tov. On Yom Tov we say the exact nusach Shemoneh Esrai for all the tefillos throughout the day except for Mussaf. On Shabbos however each tefillah has its unique nusach. Friday night it is ,אתה קדשת Shabbos morning is ישמח משה and Mincha is אתה אחד . The Avudraham writes that the special nusach of Shabbos Shemoneh Esrais is because they parallel a wedding. At night אתה קדשת is the kiddushin, in the morning ישמח משה the simcha, and Mincha is אתה אחד the YIchud.

The avodah of involved in the mitzvah of זכור את יום השבת לקדשו is to remember that Shabbos is your actual wedding day and not a mere anniversary. This is conveyed in the words of the mitzvah Remember the Shabbos לקדשו to make Kiddushin with the day of Shabbos. This is not a Purim Shpeil but a true wedding with Shabbos in the spiritual sense. This also is hinted in the gematriah of לקדשו which with the word equals אמת. Usual weddings take 5-6 hours, Rebbeshe ones take up to nine hours. In contrast your Shabbos is even more than 24 joyous hours.

The Mishna in Kiddushin states .האשה נקנית בשלש דרכים כסף שטר ביאה A woman is married through giving to her a monetary value, a document, or by living with her. Therefore, we would expect that our spiritual marriage with Shabbos possesses these three acquisitions as well. The Ari explains that we give to Shabbos our Kallah money by spending expenses in her honor such as special food and clothing etc. Marriage with a document is parallel to what Chazal say לוו עלי ואני פורע if need be, borrow money לכבוד שבת and I will repay you. This borrowing of money involves the writing of a שטר document of an I owe you. The third means of Kiddushin which is ביאה intimacy, is hinted in our words .בואי כלה בואי כלה In short the following gematriah capsulizes our Kiddushin with Shabbos כסף שטר וביאה with its letters equals בזה קנין קידושין that with these three forms of Kiddushin we marry בשבת on Shabbos our soul mate, which also shares the same gematriah of the above.

Another source from where we can derive that one must make a kinyan on the Shabbos is from the passuk ושמרו בני ישראל את השבת לעשות את השבת לדורותם. What does the passuk mean that Yisrael will make the Shabbos when we know that Shabbos comes automatically every seven days, in contrast to the date of Yom Tov which is determined by the Beis Din? We can say that the word לעשות doesn't mean merely to make but rather to make a .קנין This interpretation of kinyan is found in the passuk ואת הנפש אשר עשו בחרן which Rashi translates as acquisition. We see now that Yisrael in keeping the Shabbos properly need to make a קנין on the Shabbos in order to marry her. The passuk continues לדורותם upon which the Zohar says read it as לדירתם to reside in. That one should acquire and marry his zivug and prepare a dwelling place fitting for her to live in which is in one's heart.

Let us dive a little deeper into the above understanding that Shabbos is acquired by us as the Kallah through a Kinyan, a legal procurement tool. Purchasing an object depends upon the דעת of the purchaser. Let us look at the הגהות אשר"י in the second perek of Baba Metziah. He writes upon a scenario that a gentile sold to a Yid a sheet of tin which was then resold to another Yid. While working with the tin the new purchaser realized that under the surface of tin was a layer of silver. When the first purchaser found out that his recent buyer suddenly hit the jackpot, he wanted to renege on the deal. When they came before Rabbe Eliezer from Mitz in a ,דין תורה he paskined that the first purchaser from the goy did not acquire the silver because he was unaware that it existed under the tin. The rule is that one acquires according to his understanding and awareness what he is actually acquiring.

This psak has deep implications in Avodas Hashem as well. The more understanding we have of the mitzvah, its meaning and purpose, his heartfelt kavvanah that he has, the deeper effect and acquisition he achieves when performing it. When mitzvos become rote and habitual without thought and excitement, one sacrifices the spiritual energy that he could receive from its fulfillment. The reason is because he possesses a very weak and superficial kinyan in the mitzvah.

The Mishna in Avos says that Torah is acquired through 48 preparations in order for the Torah to be called yours. Hashem calls the gift of Shabbos a מתנה from בית גנזי His Hidden Treasure House. Does one's curiosity interest him at all to delve into what this statement even means? How much of kinyan can one have in Shabbos when he doesn't even know what the superficial meaning of this gift, never mind its deeper interpretations of delights available to partake from? If the "Hidden Treasure Chest" from where the Shabbos comes from, to you means only "A day of rest from work" then it also means a day of sleeping, eating cholent, kugel, lechayims and you, like Hidden Treasure Chest on Shabbos, stay hidden in your house and bedroom without any display of the available access to a super connection with Hashem.

On Shabbos there is a special unique flow of דעת as the passuk describes Shabbos לדעת כי אני ה' מקדישכם. That is why there is not found a beracha on Shabbos asking for daas and clarity of mind even though it is a spiritual request. The answer is because on Shabbos one receives a free dose and upgrade of a neshama yesairah which lends him this deeper perception of Hashem, Torah, the purpose and mission of life, and himself.

In Berachos 77b it says three things expand a person's mind a pleasant wife, a pleasant dwelling and pleasant vessels (furniture). For example when one had a hard and stressed day at work, it is relaxing to come home to a nice house that is orderly, a wife who greets you with a smile, and pleasant looking possessions. However, Rab Pinchus Koritzer presents a different interpretation to this statement of Chazal. The power of דעת is so incredible that even if his house is not so nice and tidy, and his wife is in a bad mood, and the sofa is ripped in two places, proper דעת and clarity can alter his situation and reframe all these compromised conditions that lie before him. This is what Chazal mean when they say three things, the דעת of a person can be מרחיב to widen and expand them. (it is not the daas which is expanded but the daas is the expander). How does the daas reframe the negative? It could have been worse. The kids could have made another two rips in the couch, your wife did not bring your suit to the cleansers and the one you are wearing just got stained by a shlemazildik waiter, and there is a flood in the basement by a broken pipe. So with clarity of mind and emunah one can reframe a bad situation into a better one.

Shabbos is that day when this flow of upper daas is free without asking, but one must nevertheless decide to make himself a vessel into which a higher level of daas can flow. This is alluded to in the Lecha Dodi רב לך שבת בעמק הבכא One has been sitting in the valley of crying for too long. The letters of the word בכא crying, are the acronym of the three things that Daas can expand בית כלים אשה . The entire week one might have dissatisfaction with the present situation of any one of these three and how they relate to him and cause his moods. However, when Shabbos comes and he makes a deeper Kinyan into his Kallah by discovering who she really is and the profound insight she has to offer to the relationship, one will find a new חן and perspective in his eyes to view these three categories.

The words עמק הבכא means to look into the valley which represents the hidden letters of בכא which are deeply imbedded into the visible letters. You will discover בי"ת כף אל"ף which is gematria.שקר This means to say that your complaints about your lot is not emes. For when Shabbos comes and one is gifted with דעת and realizes the emes, one gets closer to Hashem and he sees the chesed of Hashem because the radiant light of Hashem's emes dispels the darkness. He thinks that his lot of עמק הבכא is a curse but on Shabbos with the neshama yeseirah he can see the silver lining in his life and how what seems like a curse could have even been worse. The gematriah of עמק הבכא is ויברך. Shabbos reveals the blessing to the Yid whose lot seems to be clouded with darkness.

At times when life loses its meaning and one feels a lack of connection to ruchniyus, he must strengthen his bond with his spiritual wife Shabbos who is a true אשת חיל if she feels appreciated and respected. Every Shabbos we have the opportunity to have a new Kiddushin with three new קנינים with a UPS delivery from the most upper worlds from Hashem's Hidden treasure house gifting the neshama yesairah to you with דעת. But you must take off the bow and wrapper which is external and open up the box that contains the present of inner life, meaning, renewal, commitment, deveikus, happiness, menucha with our Creator. All one has to do is to remember זכור את יום השבת לקדשו Remember that Fri night you are getting married again with a wonderful loving radiant Kallah who is a true unwavering עזר כנגדו every second you spend with her.